Another one of those days

Well, we all have 'em.

And today was one of the worst days I've ever had, if days can be defined in terms of circumstances.

Since they can't entirely, it may have not been the worst day of my life. For I've lived long enough to know that God has a marvelous ability to take bad things that happen to us, and use them to make good things happen later...so that we can learn to love and appreciate Him more.

I am waiting on Him...and trusting that all the things that have been said about Him in my favorite songs are eternally true.

More observations on music and life next time.

Resolutions?

With the new year here, I'm sure it will hearten you to know I have given the notion of my New Year's resolutions my usual careful thought, and I will announce them here below:

1. None special(for the 44th consecutive year)

Why don't I have any New Year's resolutions? Don't I care? Don't I have goals for the coming year? Do I really think I have no reason to make any commitments to be a better person?

In order...I'll explain, yes, of course, and no, of course not.

Of course I care about being a better, more responsible person. And DEFINITELY there is much room for improvement. I'm not so sure, though, that a public "to do" about what I need to do in that regard is necessary.

And I certainly don't think a mere date on the calendar(which is all January 1st is, anyway)is reason to stress those goals as opposed to any other day.

I feel I need to resolve DAILY to be a better person...to seek God's forgiveness for not being what I should be, and not doing what I should do. And I feel the need to rededicate myself to the goals I've set for myself in light of God and His Word almost every moment of my life...and the advent of a new calendar year has nothing to do with that!

If I don't have that dedication every single moment of my life, it doesn't matter WHAT I resolve to do at the start of a new calendar year...so I don't bother to "play along" with that popular social custom.

I speak only for myself, of course. If making New Year's resolutions is helpful to you, and gives you the resolve to live your life in a better and more productive way, who am I to quibble with what works for you?

So Happy New Year, everyone...I resolve to live my life in the light of Jesus Christ as best I can, and I also hope you all resolve in your own ways to do the same!:-)

There is power in song

What makes me such a fan of gospel music?


Well, needless to say, the melodies and arrangements are very pleasing to me, and strike my musical fancy. That along with the fact that gospel music is among the most singable music there is...meaning that you can sing along with most any song written...makes it something you can participate in wherever you hear it. Of course, the best thing about gospel music is its' subject matter...the greatest story ever told...and one that can't be told enough!

Those factors combine to make the experience of gospel music a powerful one for singer and listener alike...and its' power revealed itself strikingly for me again tonight.

For today was "one of those days"...I felt as if I were swimming uphill all day today. I know we've all had plenty of days like that.

But here, tonight, at my second job, with only the internet and All Quartets Radio to keep me company...it would have been all too easy to succumb to the waves of despair that threatened to drown out the pleasure that God had intended me to have...not only today, but every day!

A conversation with a good friend helped snap me out of my doldrums...then a song I heard from this tiny speaker in the trailer I sit in at work started to fill my ears with a wonderful, reassuring message.

And you know what? I started to sing along to myself, and the song and the ones that followed it took over my senses...and suddenly, the cares of my little world didn't seem all that fearsome after all!

Good music(in the literal and figurative sense)has the power to move and transform us...sometimes in a way a sermon or a book just can't approach. For a few moments, I had the same kind of confidence that say, LaDainian Tomlinson plays football with....knowing that no matter what may come against me, it can't stop me...with God overseeing everything, I WILL prevail!

Now I know there'll be times again when I despair and feel defeated, but I know that God always has a song for me...and those moments of despair won't last long!

May I(and all of you)have a song for Him, too...and hear the voices in your life that sing to you...and be inspired!

A much needed break

Last weekend, I finally had the opportunity to get out of Fresno for more than one day…I know it doesn’t sound like much, but to me, it was like a month long vacation.



The highlight of my two day excursion into Southern California was seeing my good friends Dave, Duane, and Neil sing in person…that concert is described in the post just below this post.



But that was only one highlight among many…the trip was a much needed blessing. I am so glad I had that the chance to go and reclaim a major part of my life.



Certainly a major part of my life is Bruce Baloian, now a professor at Azusa Pacific University, and the personnel director for the Fresno area Youth For Christ when I first met him some 31 years ago. He was also leader of a couple of Campus Life clubs, one of them in Kerman, the town I grew up in.



Besides all that, Bruce was a man who spent a LOT of time explaining Jesus Christ to me while I was battling adolescent depression of the most insidious sort. I must have driven Bruce nuts trying to prove to him how wrong he was about God…but he never gave up. He kept being there as a friend, and never stopped trying to convince me that Christ was the only answer for me.



To make a long story short, he won…and on October 19, 1975 at 8:22 PM, I finally surrendered my heart and soul to Jesus Christ…and my life changed forever.



I had not seen Bruce in nearly five years when I came down to see him Friday, and we had a very nice day of reliving old acquaintances, including a very nice dinner he and his wife Karin treated me, too. Needless to say, spending time with Bruce and Karin was a major highlight of my trip as well.



One other person I was determined to see was my dear friend Nicole. I had not seen her for nearly five years, either…and I had missed her sunny disposition and her bright smile. Nicole loves Jesus as much as anyone I know, and in the past she has never failed to make Christ’s love evident to me in all she says and does. I HAD to see her.



As noted in the last post, I wanted Nicole to see Dave, Duane, and Neil with me…I knew she would enjoy the music, and I was also positive that she would admire my newest friends for their Christian commitment and walk. I was absolutely right…she loved their music, and she loved the guys as well. In so doing, I was able to do her a kind turn as well…and I was glad to give something to HER for a change. We both drew strength from seeing each other again…and that was also a major highlight of my trip.



And of course, it goes without saying that seeing Dave, Duane, and Neil was the coup de grace of it all. I got to spend quality fellowship time with all three men, and had a wonderful time catching up with what was going on in Neil’s life and world. And I even managed to get a couple of pictures taken…and this is something, because I hate seeing pictures of myself. But I got one of Nicole, Neil, and me…and one of just Neil and me…and that made me proud. If I can learn how to post pictures on here, I’ll post them once I get them.



All in all, my “retreat” was an unqualified success…everything I hoped it would be, and then some. God is really good to His “kids”, you know?

Ready to go…

I realize I’ve been relatively quiet this week.



Most of the reason for that is that I’ve been preparing for my first trip to Southern California in five years. I leave tomorrow and will spend time with some very longtime, dear friends on Friday and early Saturday, then go see Dave, Duane, and Neil(the original Couriers), some relatively new friends, sing Saturday night…then race back over the Grapevine to Fresno to make it back for work by Sunday morning.



I have needed a trip like this for some time, and I’m looking forward to every moment of it. When I return, I’l post a review of the concert here and share some other impressions as well.



See you when I get back.

One more defensive stand…

Before I begin this installment, a brief observation on the last one…

You know, it’s always gratifying to know that I’m not just writing to myself here…that there are others who drop in occasionally to see what I might have to say about whatever I happen to be discussing. Contrary to what some may think, I don’t write my thoughts down to get attention or notoriety…I’ve been there, and had that, and it doesn’t “turn my crank”, so to speak.

I write because it’s an outlet I have at my disposal to express myself, and it also gives me practice as a communicator to sharpen my skills at communicating(which can ALWAYS be improved). My last entry was actually suggested to me by a friend, who thought after we had discussed the subject at length that it might be of interest to some to have my thoughts written down about the subject.

Well, it was…but not quite the interest I would have hoped for.

One person even called me to express his/her thoughts on what I’d said(don’t even THINK I’d let on what gender this person may have been!), and took the time to correct some errors I had made, as well as making other suggestions about what I ought to have said. This was unexpected(somewhat), but welcome, as I only grow from the “sharpening” that comes from honest discussion. I might add that there IS a built in mechanism here to enable those who have comments or observations(positive or otherwise)to make them so that I don’t get TOO irresponsible here when expressing my opinion about something. Again, as in the past, I encourage those who take exception to things I say to use it, and do not only this blog, but ME a favor!

However, predictably, there were those who chose to express their disagreement in a public place amongst themselves(as if I wouldn’t see it). Along the way, not-so-veiled aspersions were cast upon my character and motivations, and some ideas I had expressed were taken out of context to drive home the point that I am a very bad person.

I have no problem with disagreement with my conclusions…I wonder why, though, if the consensus is that I am so uninformed and off-base, there is such consternation about my opinions. Surely, if my thoughts lack merit to such an extent, it ought to be easy just to dismiss what I say without any need for further comment.

Certainly, an objective reading of my comments would determine that I saw more positive things to point out than negative ones, or at least that was my intention. But I have found in the 18 years I have hosted radio talk shows, and the three and a half years that I have posted on message boards, that some people are more predisposed to respond to what they THINK you said or meant, rather than what was actually said or meant. But I forgive them, for they know not what they do(or say, in this case).
And the obvious problem with that is that usually what we tend to be concerned with motivationally bears little to no resemblance to what is actually the case. I have been as guilty of that as anyone else, and it’s not fair. That is not a complaint, merely an observation of fact.

We too often become enamored with the high-profile gifts of the Spirit and the Father, such as hospitality, exhortation, ecstatic utterance, singing, and yes, writing and speaking. And consequently we tend to ignore the lower profile ones, such as humility and discernment. Perhaps it may be time to pay less attention to OUR senses and focus more on HIS…in hopes that that will give us a clearer picture of what is around us, and how we should react to it.

As always, I’m preaching here as much to myself as to the reader…I’m already thinking of things I could have done differently to be a better example in this area. But doesn’t it make more sense, if when we as Christian people encounter that that annoys or repulses us, that we take such things to God first…before we exhale our frustration and invective to the rest of the world?

Back in 1975, the LeFevres recorded a song called “Talking ‘Bout People”, which said, in part…

Now I hear people talkin’ bout people,

But if you’re gonna talk about me…

Make sure what you’re sayin’ is done while you’re prayin’…

And please do it on your knee.

Well, this has gone on a bit, hasn’t it? I hadn’t intended to go this deep into it…but this is a mere blog, and as far as I know, there is no “Robert’s Rules of Order” for blog entries! So, with the hope that it does some good, those are my thoughts on some of the response to my last entry!

It’s a shame that my mere little words can cause such a ruckus…but I suppose that is also part of the territory covered by a public blog! Now I have a small idea of how someone like Doug Harrison feels when those who seem to oppose him out of hand take umbrage at some of his observations!

I had meant to post on another topic altogether this time, but obviously, I never got that far. Maybe next time…

Be it ever so humble…

…there’s no place like home.



After a three-month exile for necessary repairs, I am finally back in my apartment. It is hardly complete in its’ restoration…it needs carpet, more bathroom stuff, and someplace to make food…but it now lacks one thing it needed to lack a long time ago….MOLD.



Yes, the mold is gone, it is freshly painted, and now needs that special touch of “home” to be a complete dwelling place. It’ll get there, with time. Any interior decorating suggestions are most welcome.



Girl22 suggests lots of plants…maybe I should put her in charge of the project! LOL!



I’m sleeping on a Coleman air bed for the time being…it is surpisingly supportive and comfortable. And my internet is hooked up…as soon as the contractor finishes everything he said he’d do…I plan on putting my new used turntable in so I can hear all my old records again.



I can hardly wait until all this decorating is done…what a housewarming party I’ll have!

When is a loss not a loss?

When she turns out be a great new friend like girl22.

Most of you may remember me singing the praises of the person I became acquainted with as “girl22″ on a Christian singles website a while back.I was very excited for a time, because at the outset it appeared that she would become someone that would take a permanent major role in my life.

And she will still, though probably not in the way I’d originally hoped. Today she told me after some thought and prayer that she didn’t feel it would “work out” between the two of us for a romantic relationship.

She was exceedingly kind and scriptural about it, which is one of the reasons I was hopeful where she was concerned in the first place. Why so many people think it’s a failure if the other person in a relationship might not become their mate has always been hard for me to understand…there is nothing more precious than a true friend…who is loving enough to be completely transparent. And I am blessed to have more than my share of those, some of whom I’ve mentioned in these posts, and others who have posted comments here.

So girl22 and I will not be headed to Reno or Las Vegas anytime soon…but we have establshed a very wonderful, blessed friendship that will last beyond these hot summer days of mid-July.

Any new prospects then, on the “love” horizon? Well, there is actually a rather unexpected one that has arisen, but that is contingent on an act of obedience to the Lord I must do before I can go any farther there at all. If that sounds a bit cryptic, good! I don’t want to divulge any more about that here for now…I just ask that you all pray about that, God’s will be done, and His grace triumphant.

Wednesday is still the target date for returning to my apartment…I’m trusting that all will go well on that, too.

Less about me…and more about general topics next time!

Not much going on…

That’s why things have been relatively quiet around here.



I guess the biggest event going on with me right now is the fact that I’ll be moving back into my apartment come Wednesday…and it’s been a long wait. I’m glad that in just a few days, that whole sorry episode will be over.



I’m trying to not worry needlessly about some annoying car problems…things like that are always twice as annoying in weather like this(forecast high 109…currently 106 as I type). Oh well, like the man with kidney stones said, “This too shall pass!”



I had a horrid weekend in my fantasy sports leagues, and until I get that special phone call, and get moved back into my house, and until I can get my car under a semblance of control, my smile is on hold for a time.:-(



I’m off work in 13 minutes…I shall return later with more.

To be continued…

By overwhelming demand(two people asked me!), I thought I’d share how my initial get together with girl22 turned out tonight.

Unfortunately, it didn’t happen. For quite good and understandable reasons, we weren’t able to go out to dinner as planned. Nothing is wrong, though…we’ll just have to find a better time to meet…and I’m sure that when that day comes, it will be quite a nice time.

In the meantime, keep girl22 in your prayers…her life is very busy right now, and she needs the time and prayers to take care of some important business in her life.

And likewise with me…oh…before I forget, I have great news regarding my housing situation! The contractor is busily working on the unit, and I should be able to move back in one week from tonight! Be it ever so humble, there’s no place like home. If I could have a housewarming party, you’d all be invited to it!:-) Thanks for all your prayers and support during this overly long odyssey.

Several of my other friends are doing well these days, too…thank you to all who also lifted them up in prayer.

Like the current song lyric says…when you’re down to nothin’, that’s when God’s up to somethin’!

Stay tuned…this is turning out to be some ride!

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